Q: Why do we call ourselves HIKE the GEEK?
A: Because HIKERS with SARS was taken.
Q: Is there a fee to join this hiking group?
A: Rumors of a fee have been grossly exaggerated.
Q: How is HIKE the GEEK organized.
A: It is a Benevolent Dictatorship, with a strong military force to ensure the repression of coups.
Q: What should I wear?
A: Hiking is really about looking sexy…in combat boots. So we suggest wearing just combat boots.
Q: What should I bring?
A: Yourself. This might seem obvious...but given this crowd.
Always bring water, a hat, sun protection, and something to munch on. Keep a towel in the car
Q: Are there snakes and spiders?
A: Yes. If these scare you, then bring a gun. If you bring a gun, you get to walk in front.
Q: Is this group elitist?
A: Yes. If this bothers you, you are exactly the type of person we hope to alienate.
Q: What is Myers Briggs, and what does it have to do with Hiking?
A: The MBTI (Myers Briggs Type Indicator) is used to judge you. If you fail the test, you will probably not make it into the “club.” Although practice can definitely improve your score, it requires strict discipline, and most people simply break down and cry, which only lowers your score further.
For a small fee we can find you a tutor.
Q: Is there anything else I need to know?
A: Yes. We prefer new people to provide some sort of entertainment. Dancing and singing, while appreciated, is not what we are looking for. Remember...be original.
Q: How do I know if I should sign up?
A: If you are not sure you are comfortable traipsing off into the woods with a bunch of self-identified geeks into what we sometimes call "that big room with the ceiling that is sometimes blue and sometimes black with little lights" because you'd rather hike with some cool sounding singles group then you should remember that geeks really are the worlds best lovers because:
On the other hand maybe you don't think you are geeky enough to hang with real geeks. And feel a need to impersonate, you can always wear a T-shirt from some software company, or with some geek joke on it like: "There's no place like 127.0.0.1" or something else from here. But if you don't get the joke that is on you, then the joke will be on you.